Sometimes it's better to push certain things out of my mind because if they don't happen... well, I don't know. I might switch back to how I was last year or I might colapse and get sent to a madhouse.
But sometimes it's nice to let them come, to let it all come at once. That's why I love sleeping. When I dream I can't help it, things just... come. And knowing that in a while there's a good chance I'll be living it just makes everything a billion times better.
And the doubt and the not knowing for sure and the "mights" and the "maybes" just make me feel alive, like the little sparrow flying by my ankle, and I love it, I do! I fucking love being alive despite all the drama, because it's the drama that makes me feel alive!
Now excuse me (while I kiss the sky hahah) because there's a life to be lived.
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